Life changes. Relationships shift. Friends you once held dear as irreplaceable gems in your life sometimes fade away.
Of course, this, often times, is devastating. No one likes saying goodbye. It’s painful, stressful, and comes with an awful foreboding that you probably are going to dwell on the failed relationship in all the new free time you’ll have not hanging with your bestie.
The solution? Go on some friend dates.
Okay, this might sound weird, but bear with us. Friend dates are a real thing. We all know that as adults, making friends isn’t exactly as easy as it was in high school or college – we’re all cloistered at work all day and set in our own routines – so sometimes the best way to meet new people that could potentially turn into long-lasting buds, is to date them first. Platonically, of course. A meeting of the minds to see if you mesh, have things in common, and want to pursue hanging out further.
1. Make Friends from Dating Apps
Sometimes, but not always, this option might be more applicable to the gay community. You know the drill; you eventually meet up with someone only to find out you have zero-point-zero attraction to them, but they still seem cool, so you want to friend-zone them. Well, if they’re cool with that, by all means DO IT. Who knows? You might find your new BFF…
2. Make Friends from Work
At work, the word “friend” might be a bit of a stretch. Maybe you’re just acquaintances with your coworkers and neither of you have made the effort to take the relationship to the next level – OUTSIDE of the office. Make the first move and say something like, “I’m in desperate need of a drink after today. Wanna do a happy hour?” Happy Hours were basically invented for coworkers to bond and make friends. This potential friend date might be the easiest and most organic one yet. And while your imbibing, DON”T bring up work.
3. Make Friends from the Gym
You know the guy deadlifting next to you that you sometimes joke with as you power out your curls? Or that fun, bubbly girl who’s constantly doing squats that you say “hi” to every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday? Break the ice and ask one of them to spot you. Better yet, ask them if they want to be your gym buddy. You’re both doing the same thing at the same time on the same already anyway. Why not do it together? Then you can grab a protein shake together after your workout and get to know each other better.
4. Make Friends from Being Out
Unless a person is a masochist, they often like it when people are nice to them; even more so when a stranger makes the first move with a nice gesture. Think about it. How happy would you be if a completely random person came up to you and asked your advice on something or showed you completely altruistic behavior, just because? On our recent trip to Spain, eating at a local restaurant, we struck up a conversation with the server and asked him a fun place to grab drinks after dinner. He told us his favorite bar where he always goes after his work shifts, and upon taking his suggestion, wouldn’t you know we saw him there a couple hours later. We struck up a conversation with him and BOOM – that’s setting the groundwork for a potential friendship.
The moral of the story? Don’t be shy. The worse thing someone can say to you is no, that they don’t want to hang out. And so what? If they don’t want to be friends with your cute self, they probably aren’t worth it anyway 😉