I broke my foot. More specifically, my heel. Here’s a tip, kiddos – don’t drink and CLIMB.
On Saturday evening I was out for a night on the town after an epic boat excursion, going from bar to club, celebrating the last weekend with a pair of beautiful Aussies and friends. I ended up at one club and got caught talking to a friend when the group I came with said they were leaving and told me to catch up with them later.
After a few drinks I said goodbye and headed for the door to exit said club. Now, the exit is NORMALLY through a door right off of an outdoor patio. There’s a six or seven foot wall surrounding the patio and the door lets out into the parking lot. Well, on Saturday, this door was locked.
Now, let’s be honest, I was drunk (sorry, Mom). There was a line of people forming behind me who were also used to exiting through this door and those people were getting rowdy because no one was leaving. Instead of pushing my way through the throngs of drunken club-goers, I decided to act fast. I pulled myself up onto the seven foot wall, swung my body over the side…
…and everything went black.
I remember finding myself in the parking lot, which I had clearly fallen into, on the other side of the exit door. but HEY – I got out! I stood to my feet and instantly felt a sharp pain in my foot. I limped my way past dozens of people littering the street who had most likely just witnessed my fall from grace and tried to play it off like it was completely normal and not my best imitation of Humpty Dumpty.
I then called my friend, Jon, who told me he and his roommate Steven were laying in a park at 2am in the middle of West Hollywood, staring up at the smoggy LA sky, which was great news for me because it meant I could lie down!
The next day after stumbling home (on a broken foot), I went out with friends for more libations (on a broken foot) AND THEN to a Jay-Z and Beyonce concert where I danced all night (on a broken foot). I THOUGHT about going to the doctor, but, ya know, priorities.
Now I’m in a boot and on crutches for the next two weeks before my next doctor appointment. Coming Soon: Things To Do When You Have a Broken Foot.